Stay with Me!
by AlsoI'mBatman
Summary: Jason recieves a call from Dick that makes him believe Dick is dying. Jason rushes over to his big brother's apartment and finds a very different situation: A very drunk Dick Grayson. Wally, Roy and Jason team up to make Dick drunk dial other members of the Batfamily.
1. Chapter 1

**Stay with Me!**

Jason was sitting in his apartment, staring at the ceiling. He didn't have a TV, or a date, or something to blow up at the moment. In short, he was bored. That's when the phone rang. He lazily moved to pick it up, and was surprised to hear Dick's voice when he did.

"I love you Jay, you're my brother and I really, really love you."

"Dick, are you okay? You're not like... hurt or anything?" he didn't get an answer, "Oh my God, are you dying?" Jason paused for an answer again, "Dick!? Answer me?!"

"No, Jaybird, I'm fine. Everything's gonna be alright... everything's gonna be alright," Dick's voice began to trail off as if he were drifting to sleep.

"I swear on my life, Goldie, if you die, I will come after you," Jason paused again but didn't get an answer, "Don't. You. Dare. Hang. Up." Jason grabbed his helmet and headed out to his motorcycle and began to trace the call.

It was from Dick's apartment in Bludhaven. He switched the call from his phone to the wireless in his helmet and headed over to the apartment. He was already in Bludhaven.

A million things ran through his mind, was it Joker toxin? One of Scarecrow's formulas? Maybe even something from Poison Ivy...

"Dick? Keep talking to me."

"I... I..." Dick's voice trailed off. _Oh God, Bruce is going to flip if something happens to his favorite bird._ Jason's thoughts ran rapidly.

"Jay?" Dick said weakly.

"Ya," Jason answered.

"I... I want you to know that I'm proud of you. And I always have been."

"Come on Golden Boy, stay with me, Dick! Don't get off this line!" Jason's bike was now only a few blocks from Dick's apartment. He spent a few more moments in a panic until he saw the apartment building. He started to skid into a parking spot, when he heard giggles coming from the other side of the phone line.

"Dick?" He narrowed his eyes. He couldn't quite get rid of that feeling in his stomach of complete panic. _Bruce will not be able to handle this, and if I let him die, he'll blame me. That's the only reason I'm concerned... Ya, that's the only reason._ He rationalized as he ran up the stairs to the floor he knew Dick would be on.

When he reached it he opened the door with his shoulder (No time to knock!) and ran into the apartment. He found Dick, lying on the ground. He ran to the man and held his head up.

"Dick?!"

"Jay?! You came?" Dick's eyes were closing.

"Ya, Dick, I... " Jason started out with sincere gentleness, "Wait... why do you smell like... alcohol...?" It was that moment that he heard full out laughter from the other side of the couch that Dick was lying next to. He narrowed his eyes and threw off his helmet. Roy and Wally came around the other side of the couch, clutching their stomachs.

"Oh my God! You actually showed up?!" Roy spoke up. Jason stood up quickly and gripped the shirt of the closest laughing person, it was Wally.

"What did you _do_?!" Jason spit out between gritted teeth.

"Nothing! I swear! We just came over and Roy brought the beer and we kinda spiked all of Dick's drinks and we wanted him to drunk dial someone so we put in your number and told him to talk and -" Jason let go of Wally's shirt to cut off the words the Speedster was slurring together in one run-on sentence.

"So he's drunk?" The two men in front of him nodded,"Not dying?" The two men nodded to him again.

"I told you I was fine, Jay," Dick mumbled from the floor.

"I am so done." Jason raised his hands up and turned to leave.

"Hey wait! Come on Jay, we put in your number and handed him the phone, and he really wanted to talk to you. Who are we to stop a man from calling his little brother?" Jason didn't like the way Roy put emphasis on the word 'little' but he let it slide for the moment.

"Ya, we thought he was going to say something embarrassing while drunk dialing, not deep and philisophical," Wally piped up. He was obviously the most intoxicated one there, except for Dick, because his words were coming out slurred and he was swaying a little bit in the spot he stood.

Suddenly Jason had an idea.

"Hey, Roy, got any more beer?"

"Sure." Roy tossed him one.

"Let's make Dick call Barbara."

**Author's Note: I love your guy's review ideas! Special thanks to HowDracoGotHisGrooveBack and 5-STAR for the idea of calling Bruce! I already have that chapter written... ;) **

**Now I'll write Barbara's and post it as the next chapter, if anyone has a suggestion of another person to call (I might do Commissioner Gordon!) leave a review!**


	2. Barbara

**BARBARA**

"Pass me another beer, Roy," Wally shouted from his position on the floor. Dick was leaning against the couch while sitting on the floor with Wally on his right side and Jason on his left. Roy was returning from a bathroom break.

"I dunno, Walls, I don't think you're gonna make it through the next few phone calls..."

"Whaaaat? Dick has had waaaay more than I have, besides I have a high metabolism so I'll burn it off if I don't have another one."

"Fine, but don't blame me if you pass out and miss the next call," Roy relented as he passed Wally another beer.

"Guys!" Jason suddenly shouted,"It's ringing!" He pointed to the phone in Dick's hand that was on speaker phone. Roy took a seat beside Jason and they all huddled around the phone.

_"Hello, you've reached Barbara Gordon, please leave a message after the beep. Unless this is Roy... or Wally... or Jason... or Dick, unless your asking for something reasonable. If you are one of those people listed and are being stupid, please hang up. If not, I'd love to hear from you!"_

Dick hung up the phone before the beep tone sounded and recieved protests from the rest of the men in the group.

"What are you doing? Leave a message!" Jason shouted.

"But Jason, I'm on the list! I don't want to bother-"

"Leave a God damned message, Grayson! This is supposed to be hilarious!" Jason hit the redial button on the phone himself, but left it in Dick's hands.

"But, Jaaaay, I'm on the liiiiist!" Dick protested.

"Hello?" He heard a voice on the other end of the line before he could argue any more.

"Oh my gosh, Babs, I'm so sorry! I know I'm on the list and I didn't want to call you but I was forced and now I'm talking to you and you don't want me to I'm so sorry-"

"Woah, woah, woah... what? Who is this?" Barbara struggled to understand the jumbled sentence that had just been shouted at her.

"Dick!" Everything fell into place in Barbara's mind. _The list._

"Are you talking about that voice message that I made one night after you prank called me?"

"Yes."

"Are you drunk, or just really, really stupid?" Roy, Jason and Wally leaned into the phone and shouted a reply for Barbara.

"BOTH!" They laughed uncontrollably on either side of Dick.

"Is that Roy... and Wally?"

"...aaaaand Jason!" Jason shouted into the phone.

"I'm so sorry, Babs!" Dick sobbed, "We're all on _the list_!" Dick sounded so upset that Barbara took pity on him.

"It's fine Dick, I'm not mad at you. I assume Wally and Roy called me and put the phone in your hands?"

"...aaaaand Jason!" Jason shouted again.

"Are we really that predictable?" Roy asked Wally. The Speedster shrugged.

"Ya, and Jason. Look, Dick, I'm going to forgive you-" She was interrupted by an emotional acrobat.

"Thank you! I love you! You're the greatest person that ever lived on planet Earth!"

"-I will forgive you _if_ you do something for me," She finished her sentence. Dick nodded his head furiously, before realising that he was speaking to her on the phone.

"Ok! Anything for you Babs! I mean that, anything!"

"Hang up the phone-"

"OK!" Dick replied enthusiastically before Barbara could finish, but Jason stopped him from hanging up.

"-Wait, wait, I'm not done! First hang up the phone, and _then_..." She paused for dramatic effect,"You have to call your dad." There was nothing but silence from Dick's side of the phone line and Barbara begun to wonder if he dropped the phone.

"Call your dad?" Dick finally replied.

"NO! No, no, no! _Your_ dad! Call Bruce!"

"Should I also call your dad?"

"No, please don't call my father!" Barbara had no idea how her dad would react a very drunk Dick Grayson, and she wasn't sure she wanted to find out.

"We sure won't Barb, nice talkin' to ya!" Roy yelled. He shared a look with Wally that suggested they would anyway.

"I'm gonna call Bruce now, bye Babs!" Dick shouted. He hung up and started dialing the number for Wayne Manor.

Barbara put her phone down and made her way to the computer. She opened up her files, after entering several passwords, and hacked into the phone at Wayne Manor. Bruce had reluctantly agreed to allow her access if she only used it in emergencies, and protected it with a heavy amount of passwords and encyriptions. This counted as an emergency right? If she didn't listen to drunk Dick Grayson call his father, she would be bored!

"I'll have blackmail material for years," Barbara muttered to herself.


	3. Bruce

**BRUCE**

**"**Master Bruce?"

"Yes, Alfred?" Bruce looked up from his desk where he was completing paperwork. Alfred held a phone to his ear.

"A call from Master Dick." Alfred handed Bruce the phone, and quietly left the room. Bruce looked after him with a puzzeled expression for a few seconds. _He looked... irritated..._

"Uh... Hello?"

"BRUUUUCE!" Bruce had to hold the phone away from his ear as a chorus of voices shouted his name. It took the World's Greatest Detective about three seconds to realize that they were all intoxicated.

"Okay, so Bruce, I have a serious question!" Dick was still talking into the phone much to loud to be sober.

"Bruce," Dick paused for a long moment, and Bruce could picture him swaying where he stood,"Why,"Another pause,"Does Damian get pets but _I_ never got any pets, Bruce?!"

"You are saying my name _way_ to many times to be sober."

"Psssh, na-uh," Bruce could hear giggling through the phone,"I'm not drunk! I didn't have anything to drink 'sides the sodas Roy brought!" Bruce didn't answer, hoping that Dick would think about what he just said. After a moment he sighed.

"Dick I thought I raised you to be a detective."

"Bruuuuuuce! Why does Damian get a kitty cat?"

"You're twenty-three! Get your own cat!"

"Bruuuuuuce!" Dick whined. Bruce started to rub his temples. He could feel a headache coming on.

"Dick, do I have to remind you what happened to the goldfish?"

"_Captain Fishy_?!" Dick shouted. Bruce sighed. Yes, he could feel that headache now.

"Yes, that one."

"You said he ran away!"

"Oh my God! Dick, he was a goldfish!"

"But you _said_, Bruce!"

"I know what I said, but that's because you were eight years old. You dealt with death much more than any eight year old ever should, so that's why I told you your goldfish ran away."

"I wanna 'nother goldfish!"

"You're _twenty-three_, buy your own!" Bruce opened the top desk compartment and opened a false bottom, and took out a flask.

"So what really happened to Captain Fishy?"

"You didn't feed it for _three weeks._" There was a long pause on the other end of the line, where Bruce could hear nothing but laughter from who he assumed was Roy and Wally.

"Soooo...?" Dick was still confused. Bruce smacked his head on the desk.

"So he starved, Dick." There was another pause for Dick to process that information.

"Oh my God, I killed him! Bruce, I'm so sorry, Bruce!" Dick's next words were further away, as if he were telling someone out of the room the news, "I _killed _him!"

"OH MY GOD! Bruce is going to be pissed!" Bruce heard another voice that he recognized that did not belong to Wally or Roy.

"...Jason?"

"I'll protect you Dickie! You can join the 'Bruce Hates Me for Killing Stuff Club!' You can live with me, and I won't let him be hurt you!" Jason was obviously just as intoxicated as Dick. Bruce took another swig from his flask.

"Jason, we've been over this, I don't hate you. You even stayed at the Manor last week and Alfred made you cookies." Bruce didn't think Jason heard what he said because Dick was wailing into the phone.

"Bruce, are you mad at me, Bruce?!"

"Dick, it was a _goldfish_. And you were _eight_." Suddenly the wailing stopped, and Dick's next words were once again muffled, as if he was talking to someone away from the phone.

"He's not mad!" There was a pause before Bruce could make out what anyone on the phone was saying.

"...Soooo, you _won't_ be joining the club?" It was Jason. Bruce took another quick swig from his flask before talking again.

"Dick, I have to go. Why don't you go get sober."

"But Bruce, I toooold you. I'm not drunk!" Bruce took in a very long, deep breath.

"Wally and Roy come to your apartment every Friday and spike your drinks, and _every_ Friday I get a call from you asking me why Damian gets a kitty cat."

"Psssh, no they don't!"

"Dick I really doubt your going to remember this conversation, because you didn't remember any of the others."

"My friends wouldn't do that!" Bruce stayed silent in hopes that Dick would think about what he just said.

"Okay, maybe Jason would..." Bruce heard a protest from who he assumed was Jason,"Okay, Roy definately would..." Bruce heard Roy laugh in the backround,"I dunno if Wally would..."

"Ya I totally would, bro," Wally piped up.

"Bruce, I have to go strangle my friends. Love you, bye!"

"I'll talk to you again like this next Friday." Bruce hung up the phone and put the flask back in the compartment just as Alfred was entering the room.

"Some things never change, Master Bruce."

"I just wish he wasn't so trusting."

"Yes, I suppose he is loyal to a fault isn't he?" Bruce nodded in agreement.

"He asked about the goldfish," Bruce revealed.

"Captain Fishy?" Bruce nodded.

"I assume you didn't try to pursuade him that it truly ran away..."

"No but I could've." This time it was Alfred to rub his temples. He turned to leave Bruce's office and almost made it out the door before he heard Bruce's question.

"Hey, Alfred, why didn't I get a puppy when I was little? Damian gets a puppy."


	4. Commissioner Gordon

**Commissioner Gordon**

Dick closed the door behind him as he entered his father's office. Bruce held a finger up to signal for him to wait until he was finished with his phone conversation to speak.

"I'm sorry, but Wayne Tech just can't put money into an invention that doesn't exist, and I don't care if your eight year old _really_ wants a Web Shooter we are not attempting to make one," Bruce gave an exasperated sigh as he listened to the other end of the phone call, "I understand, but we need legitiment proof that it could exist," He paused again to listen and rolled his eyes,"Well Spiderman doesn't exist. I'm sorry Mr. Lincoln I'll talk to you another time, I have family over. Goodbye."

"Did you just pass up a perfectly good opporunity for Wayne Tech to make Web Shooters?"

"Dick, there is absoulutly no business strategy to Web Shooters."

"Ya, but Web Shooters are cool! Spiderman has Web Shooters!" Dick ungracefully took a seat in the plush chair across from the Billionaire.

"That's what Mr. Lincoln's eight year old son said, but like I told Mr. Lincoln: Spiderman," Bruce paused for dramatic effect, "does not exist."

"He could if Wayne Tech made Web Shooters!" Dick defended. It was that moment that Alfred entered the office quietly, holding a cell phone.

"Pardon the interruption-"

"We're not talking about anything important," Bruce interrupted and looked pointedly at Dick.

"Miss Gordon is on the phone and is asking to speak with you," Alfred finished his sentence and held the phone out for Dick to take. Dick reached for the phone and put it to his ear.

"Hey, Babs-!"

"Oh don't you dare, 'Hey, Babs' me, Grayson! I swear if I could move my goddamn legs, I would kick you straight in your-"

"Babs? I'm really confused..."

Alfred and Bruce winced, even they could hear the angry girl. Alfred quietly slipped out of the room.

"Oh and wait until I get my hands on Bruce! I will gut you both! Roy, Jason and Wally are going to be recieving phone calls as well." Dick put the phone on speaker so Bruce could join the discussion now that his name came up.

"Why are you angry at us?" Bruce asked after letting her yell for a bit longer.

"Don't play innocent! You know exactly what you did! Did you really think he wouldn't tell me?"

"Sorry to break it to you, but we really have no idea what you're talking about," Bruce waited for a reply. He and Dick shared a look when they got nothing but silence.

"Uh, Babs?" Dick cautiously asked. Barbara gave a massive sigh.

"You really don't remember?" Dick and Bruce exchanged another worried look.

"No...?" Bruce answered.

"Are you at the Manor?"

"Ya. I really don't understand what-" Dick started to say, but Barbara interrupted.

"I'll be there in ten minutes." She hung up the phone, leaving Bruce and Dick in complete confusion.

"So..." Bruce spoke up after a brief silence,"Is she coming to kick our ass or...?"

"How should I know?! You're the World's Greatest Detective!" Dick threw up his hands in exasperation.

"Son, listen, they may call me the World's Greatest Detective, but there is one thing that even Batman will never understand," Bruce paused for a moment before finishing, "Women."

**()()()**

Bruce and Dick spent the next ten minutes pacing back and forth and throwing around ideas.

"Well I think she's going to come to kick our asses," Dick said matter-of-factly.

"We don't know that. Maybe she's going to... um...?" Bruce continued pacing and put his hand on his chin, but did not complete the thought. That was when they heard the doorbell ring. Bruce and Dick turned to each other with wide eyes.

"What do we do?!" Dick yelled the question.

"Why are we worried? We're two of the most respected heroes in the world!" Bruce answered, but his eyes were just as wide as Dick's.

"Ya, sure, but that doesn't mean women can't scare the Hell out of us!" It was that moment that Alfred entered the room once more, one eyebrow raised as he caught the sentence Dick had yelled.

"Miss Gordon is waiting downstairs for you two."

"Does she have any weapons?" Dick asked with a genuine look of terror. Alfred narrowed his eyes in confusion as he looked between his two family members, who were both looking at him with wide eyes.

"I'm wondering what you have done to her that makes you feel like that is not a foolish question..." Alfred voiced his confusion.

"We don't know!" Bruce and Dick yelled at the same time. Alfred looked at the two men he had raised for a long moment.

"Don't you think it would be best to ask her?" Alfred inquired after they made no effort to exit the room. Dick and Bruce exchanged another look.

"Will you come with us? She probably won't kill us in front of you." Alfred almost laughed at the seriousness in Bruce's question.

"I believe you two are grown up enough to face this on your own," He answered as he gestured to the office door. Bruce and Dick reluctantly made their way to the entryway, where they were told Barbara was waiting. When Dick caught a glance of the wheelchair-bound girl he stopped in the middle of the hallway. Bruce nearly ran into him.

"Bruce, you go first!" He all but shoved the Billionaire in front of him.

"Oh, no! You got us into this!"

"How do you know? She said she's mad at both of us!"

"I'm the World's Greatest Detective, you said that yourself!" Bruce sighed when he saw that his twenty-three year old son was giving him a pout, and damn, it hadn't changed since the kid was eight. Those baby blue puppy dog eyes burned into his soul.

"Dick..."

"Please Bruce?" Dick whispered, "I'm to young to die." Bruce sighed and moved in front of his son.

"Fine, but you owe me." They continued walking, with Bruce in front of Dick, until they were eye to eye with the girl that was currently putting fear into their hearts.

"How've you been, Barbara-?" Bruce tried to start off calmly, but Barbara interrupted.

"Shut it." She handed Dick what looked like a computer memory stick.

"Um, I... don't get it..." Dick stated. Barbara nearly facepalmed.

"Plug it into the computer, moron." She followed Bruce and Dick as they went to the Batcave so they could use the biggest computer in the house. Barbara and Bruce stood by the computer and waited patiently for Dick to put it in.

After a moment of loading the file came up. It was a sound file. Dick hit play after a moment of silence.

_"Hello?"_

_ "Hi, Jim!"_

_ "May I ask who's calling?"_

_ "I'm Batman! Hahaha, no just kidding, it's Dick!" _It was painfully obvious that Dick was intoxicated at the time of the call. Dick rushed to the computer and paused the file.

"We called your father?!" Dick practically screamed at the top of his lungs.

"We? Don't involve me in this!" Bruce raised his hands defensively.

"Oh, that's funny! You two really don't remember!" Barbara started laughing,"What do you remember from Friday?"

**The Friday before...**

Roy, Wally and Jason knocked on the door to Dick's apartment.

"Hey Dickhead!" Jason greeted when Dick answered.

"Jason," Dick scowled.

"You don't still have hard feelings over last week do you?" Roy shifted the packs of beer he had brought to his other hip.

"Yes, I'm still mad about last week!"

"Why did Barbara have to ruin our fun by telling you?" Wally groaned.

"Because she cares for my well-being?" Dick suggested.

"Maybe," Jason said as he pushed past Dick and entered the apartment. Roy and Wally followed him, and Dick sighed as he closed the door. Jason was surprised to see Bruce sitting on the couch of Dick's apartment.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, not unkindly.

"Making sure I don't get another drunk phone call."

That was, ironically, the last sober moment Dick or Bruce remembered. They had woke up the next morning with headaches and foggy memories. Even Roy, Wally, and Jason couldn't explain what had happened.

Dick groaned and sat up from where he was laying against Bruce's shoulder, and wiped the trail of drool from his mouth. There was a puddle of it left on Bruce's shoulder.

"Ugh, gross," Bruce had groaned when he saw it. That's when they heard Wally mumble something from his position on the floor in front of the couch. He sat up and rubbed his head. Jason jerked upright from where he had been sleeping, leaning against Dick's shoulder.

"I was not using you as a pillow, Grayson. If you so much as mention this again, I will murder you." Before anyone could reply, Roy shuffled in from one of the other rooms.

"Guys... I just woke up in the closet..."

**()()()**

"So that's pretty much it..." Dick put his hand to the back of his neck as he finished explaining.

"Ok, I'll explain the rest. I tapped your phone line because you always seem to have... _interesting_... phone conversations when Roy and Wally come over. I didn't expect Jason or Bruce, but they were there too. You broke your promise and called my dad." Barbara glared daggers at Dick.

"It wasn't _that _bad was it?" Dick asked desperately. Barbara replied by hitting play on the audio file.

_"Dick? Why are you calling me at midnight?" _

_ "Hey, Commish!" Jason spoke up instead of Dick_, _"I am, like, suuuper sorry about all those murders..."_

_"What? Who is that? Who murdered people?" Jim was starting to get very worried. Someone in the backround shushed Jason._

_"Dick, are you drunk?"_

_ "What? No! Maybe... I dunno, I have horrible friends..." Dick trailed off._

_"What?"_

_ "Jim,you're daughter is the most beautiful person in the whole world!" Dick suddenly yelled. _

In the center of the Batcave, listening to the file, Dick was blushing furiously, while trying to avoid the looks he was recieving from both his father and the girl in the wheelchair.

_"Did you call me at midnight just to compliment my daughter?"_

_ "No. Maybe... I dunno, I can't really remember why I called you..."_

_ "Hey, Commissioner, why don't you ever thank Batman?" Bruce took the phone from Dick._

_"Bruce is that you? How many people are over there?" Bruce took the question literally and counted._

_"Five,"_ _he paused before continuing_,_"You should totally leave Batman cookies, that would be cool."_

_ "What? Why do you care if I leave Batman cookies?"_

_ "Cookies?!" Wally yelled._

Bruce paused the audio file and turned to look at Dick.

"You let me talk to Jim Gordon!"

"Don't blame me, I was drunk!" Bruce turned to Barbara.

"It doesn't get any worse, does it?"

"No, but my dad wants to talk to you," She looked at Dick next, "_Both_ of you." Dick and Bruce groaned at the same time.

"I made sure you didn't call anyone else after my dad hung up on you-" Barbara started, but Dick interrupted.

"How?"

"I hacked your phone line... sorry," She added the apology after recieving a lighthearted sigh,"Would you rather I left you to call anyone else?"

"No!" Bruce and Dick answered at the same time.

"I'm going to decide to be nice this time and _not _murder you both, but I swear if you ever drunk dial my father again and say more... uh... well actually... flattering... things about me," She looked at Dick and he blushed again,"I will murder you. Deal?"

"Deal."

Barbara started to wheel her way back upstairs and Bruce turned to follow, before Dick called his name.

"Hey, Bruce, wanna come to my place next weekend? We had a pretty interesting time last Friday," He said slyly.

"No!" Came the quick reply.


	5. Tim

**Tim**

"Do _not, _and I mean it, _do not_, spike Tim's drinks. Don't 'accidently' forget to tell him that you put alcohol in a drink, and do not let him have any of your drinks. Do I make myself clear?" Bruce was glaring at Roy, Jason and Wally with the rath of Batman.

"Why are you looking at us like that, Bruce? Dick was drunk last week when we called the Commish too," Jason pointed his finger at Dick, who was holding his arms across his chest as he stood behind his father with Tim. They were standing in front of Bruce's car, outside of Dick's apartment.

"Yes but I assume it was because of something you three did, but I can't remember because I, unfortunatly, was drunk as well," he glared pointedly at Roy and Wally, who at this point looked like they were going to wet themselves. Jason rolled his eyes, and Dick stuck his toungue out at him. Jason narrowed his eyes and threw his hands up in exasperation.

"Fine, I, Jason Peter Todd, do solemnly swear," Jason put one hand over his heart and one hand up in the air, "That no attempts will be made by me-"

"I want _all of you _to promise," Bruce practically growled. Jason sighed and nudged Wally and Roy, who were still looking at the very angry Bruce Wayne with wide eyes. Once they realised what he wanted they mimicked Jason's hand gestures, one hand over thier heart and the other raised in the air.

"Repeat after me. I, 'Your name'-" Bruce sighed when Wally repeated the words 'your name' instead of adding his name. Roy hit Wally in the arm.

"Oh, uh, Wallace Rudolph West..." Wally corrected himself.

"Swear on my life," Bruce paused to let them repeat it,"that I will not corrupt the mind of the boy who is currently under the age of 21:," He paused again and glared when Jason rolled his eyes, " Timothy Jackson Drake."

The three men finished their oath at slightly different times, and when they were all done, Jason clapped his hands together.

"Alrighty then! Come on Repla-" He changed courses when Bruce gave him a glare, "Timmy. We're gonna have a blast this weekend."

"Your supposed to take care of him, not 'have a blast,'" Bruce said dryly.

"Oh, have some fun once in a while Bruce." Jason rolled his eyes again.

"You have his emergency contacts and phone numbers to call if something happens. You have his inhaler-

"Bruce, I don't have asthma..." Tim tried to protest.

"You have directions on what to do if-"

"Bruce, chill out, I'll make sure Timmy stays super safe. Trust me." Dick gave Bruce one of his most disarming smiles, but the Billionaire wasn't buying it, "If things get out of hand, I'll call Barbara, I know she doesn't exactly owe me any favors right now, but she's not going to turn little Timmy away." Tim raised his hands up in exasperation as he stood behind Dick.

"Guys, I'm eighteen, why does everyone think I'm eight?" he sighed to no one in particular.

"Your eighteen?" Roy asked as he looked between Tim and Jason with a sly look.

"Um, ya..."

"You can get into all the best places when your eighteen..." Roy winked. Dick glared at Roy and made a motion of cutting across his throat to signal that the conversation needed to end right there. Bruce gave the group of boys one last glare and got back in his car. They waved as he sped off down the road, leaving Tim behind with an overnight bag.

"This was a great idea! Tim, have you ever been to a nightclub?"

"No. No, no, no, no, no. That is not happening. I swear if I wake up in some weird place again, I will call the cops and have you arrested," Dick threatened Roy.

"Aren't you a cop in Bludhaven..." Tim asked.

"I'm not on duty tonight. That doesn't mean I can't call another cop and have him charge you with drugging me."

"No, _drugs_. I promise," Roy said seriously, "That's not a joke." Dick nodded, satisfied with Roy's answer. They made their way inside and up the stairs to Dick's apartment.

"Tim you can set your stuff in the guest room, and Wally, Roy and Jason can all leave, because there is going to be no partying tonight."

"Can I have _one _beer before we go?" Wally asked.

"Ya, can I have _one_ shot, just _one_," Jason asked his question with the same innocent tone.

"No, nobody's doing shots! Get out of my apartment."

"Umm, Dick... where's Roy?" Tim asked innocently. It was that moment that Roy came out of Dick's room with a can in his hand.

"Roy, where did you find that?" Dick asked cautiously, he had a feeling that he knew what it was.

"By your Nightwing costume, which, by the way,you really need to put where no one can see it," Roy answered. Jason, Wally, Roy and Tim were looking at Dick strangely.

"Why are you freakin' out, bro?" Jason voiced their questions.

"That is not a beer, don't open it! It's a toxin that Poison Ivy slipped in my costume and I have no idea what it does."

"How did Poison Ivy slip something in your costume?" Wally asked with a sly glance at Dick.

"_That's _what your worried about?! What about the fact that Roy, the most irresponsible person I know, is holding something that has the potential to kill us?!"

"Uh, guys... I kinda already opened it..." Roy pointed to the hole at the top, where a gas was leaking out.

"Well we're not dead yet," Wally said, genuinly optimistically.

**()()()**

Dick sat up. He was on his couch. _Oh thank, God! We just passed out!_ He looked around and noticed it was daytime. There was a broken lamp on the ground, but other than that nothing seemed to be to out of the ordinary. He couldn't see Jason, Roy, or Wally. _Maybe they actually left like I asked them to..._

"Tim?" He started to call out for his little brother,"Timmy?" He repeated when he got no reply. That was when he saw Roy walk in from his room. He had a giant red mark on his cheek that looked like he had been sleeping against something.

"Roy? Are you ok?"

"I dunno... Why do I always wake up in your closet?"

"I don't know, but what the Hell happened!" Dick was beginning to panic. He had no idea what that toxin did. He ran into the guest room and was relieved when he saw a lump under the covers, and heard light snoring. He took in a big sigh of relief.

"Timmy, I'm so glad your safe. Bruce would literally murder me if... Wally?" He drew close enough to the sleeping figure to notice the red hair. Wally sat up and rubbed his head. Dick noticed the bruise forming over his eye.

"What happened to Tim?"

"I dunno, I just woke up here!" Wally replied. Dick ran out of the room, straight up to Roy.

"This is your fault!" He punched him right in the nose. The blow was so unexpected that Roy ended up falling to the ground, "You made me lose my little brother!"

"Dude, chill out! He's probably with Jason somewhere," Roy suggested. That is the moment that Dick realised that he still hadn't found Jason. He breathed another sigh of relief and helped Roy up.

"Sorry, Roy," He apologised and hoped that he didn't break the man's nose.

"It's fine, it was kind of my fault..."

"Kind of?" Dick gave Roy a look.

"Okay, it was my fault, but we're going to find Tim and return him to Bruce, safe and sound." Wally entered the room and groaned loudly.

"Guys this is just like that movie! I'm gonna see if there's a tiger in the bathroom!" Roy and Dick gave him a look as he used superspeed to run out of the room.

"What the Hell is wrong with him?" Dick asked, rhetorically.

"I dunno," Roy rubbed his head.

"You deal with the Speedster, I'll find Tim," Dick suggested.

"Oh, no! You are not sticking me with babysitting!"

"He's not much younger than you are!"

"Doesn't mean he acts like it!"

"Roy, do you remember what you did on the night of May 7, nine years ago?" Dick looked at Roy expectantly.

"What?! No, I don't remember what I did on a specific date _nine_ _years_ ago!" Dick began pacing as if he were beginning a police investigation.

"Nine years ago, on the date of May 7, you were with me."

"The why are you asking?"

"Because, nine years ago, on the date of-"

"Alright I get it, spit it out!"

"You convinced me and Wally that taking the Batmobile out for a joy ride was a great idea. As we stand here today you remember that it was, in fact, a terrible freaking idea. So I took the blame because I was the one driving, and my father is freaking _Batman_, and you said, and I quote 'Gee thanks, Dick, you are by far the coolest and greatest person ever to live on-"

"I don't think that's a quote, Dick."

"Okay, but to the point, you said 'I owe you one, bro,' and now I'm calling you out."

"You remembered the exact date..." Dick nodded, "Because I said I owed you one..." Dick nodded again, "You are something else, Dick, but I suppose if I was raised by Batman I would have my quirks to." Roy sighed.

"Also I'm going to bring up the fact that for the past few Fridays you have spiked all of my drinks and made me drunk dial several of my friends and family members."

"Okay, okay, I get it. I owe you a few favors, I'll stay here with Wally and you go use your detective skills to find Jason and Tim." Roy nodded to Dick and they searched the apartment before coming to the conclusion that Tim and Jason were not there. They also came to the conclusion that they would only ask Barbara for the security footage of the night before as a last resort. None of them wanted any more people involved.

So Dick went outside and got into his car to start his search. He didn't start it, first he would make a couple phone calls. Beginning with the obvious: Jason and Tim's cell phones.

"Hey, leave your name and number after the beep and I'll call back if I feel like talking to you." Jason didn't say his name in his voicemail, but Dick could easily tell he had the right number. Tim's phone was next. Dick was expecting a polite voicemail from Tim, something like 'Sorry I missed your call!' but what he got was something else entirely.

"Shots, shots, shots, shots!" It was Jason's voice.

"Do not give my little bro alcohol, I will... umm... I dunno... something bad will happen to you." Dick cringed as he heard his own, drunk sounding, voice.

"Your drinks," Dick sat upright when he heard a woman's voice,"Thanks for coming into Candy's bar, it's not every day we get big names in here like Richard Grayson," the woman all but purred. That was when the beep sounded. Tim must've accidently hit something on his phone that changed his voicemail to the recording of the night before. But Dick didn't care, he had a name.

He started the car and made his way to Candy's Bar. He didn't think he'd ever been there before, but if it would lead him to answers, he would go. Once he got there, he parked in the front, and made his way inside. It was so early in the morning, it looked almost closed.

"Hey hon! I'm so glad you came back!"

"You recognize me?"

"Sure, everyone recognizes you, hon. You were just here yesterday anyway." Dick put a hand to the back of his neck.

"Yaaa, that's the thing... we don't remember anything, I was hoping you'd know where we went after this. I'm trying to find my little brothers."

"Oh my... this is just like that movie! You didn't find a baby in your closet did you?"

"Umm... no." Dick didn't understand. _First Wally's worried about tigers in the bathroom and now there's babies in the closet...?_

"Oh that's good," The woman breathed a sigh of relief, "I think you were going to go to the park... something about... the red head shooting trick arrows at homeless people? I don't really know..." Dick nodded to the woman and all but ran out of the nightclub. He jumped in his car and headed to the park.

After searching the area for a few minutes he decided he had no choice but ask the homeless man on the bench for details. It was when he got close to the homeless man on the bench that he realised that it wasn't a homeless man at all.

"Jason?"

"Dick! I woke up a little while ago on this park bench! Where the Hell did you guys go?"

"I don't know, we woke up at home... where's Tim?"

"I thought he was with you!" Jason stood up quickly.

"No! I don't know where he is!"

"Oh my God, Dick, I don't wanna die! Not again! Bruce is going to murder us!"

"Only if we're lucky, Jason. Only if we're lucky," Dick answered with complete seriousness.

"Did you call the Manor?"

"What?"

"Did you call the Manor?" Jason repeated.

"No one's there, Bruce is on his business trip and Alfred's helping his mother in England..."

"Ya, but what if Tim made his way back there, he's a smart kid." Dick's eyes widened as he realised that Jason could be right. He pulled out his cell phone and put in the number.

"Wayne Manor, how can I be of service?"

"Oh my God, Tim! Thank God! Are you really at the Manor?"

"Ya, I woke up here and found out that I had ordered myself pizza last night."

"Are you okay?" Jason pitched in.

"Ya, I'm eating pizza," Tim said, it was obvious that he had his mouth full. Dick and Jason gave a huge sigh of relief.

"How did you get home?"

"I think it has something to do with the note I left myself that says, "Kill Roy, hit Jason, apologize for hitting Wally... by the way, did I hit Wally?"

"Ya, he has a black eye, that's probably what it's from," Dick answered.

"Oh, anyway, it goes on to say, fix tire tracks on the grass left by taxi, and order pizza," Tim continued.

"You took a taxi?"

"I guess."

"And made a to do list?!" Jason asked.

"Hey, I like being organized!" Tim defended, "Also by the way, if you don't want me to tell Bruce that you all totally broke your promise, you will be nice to me."

"Fine," Jason and Dick agreed.

"So I can cross off 'Order pizza and fix tire tracks' so all I need to do is murder Roy, hit Jason and apologize to Wally," Tim smirked to himself.

"Okay, you can start by calling Wally, I'll help you assasinate Roy and if you want I can hit Jason right now for you...?" Dick suggested seriously.

"No that's okay, I'll hit Jason when I see him."

"Alright, bye Timmy!" Dick hung up happily. He turned and found Jason staring at him.

"What?"

"Did you just offer to hit me?"

"It's for Timmy!"

"Just start the damn car. Let's go," Jason grumbled.


End file.
